23.9.05

wearing the past

I don’t really know how old the shirt is. But I know it is old. Old enough for me to not clearly remember when it was bought, nor when I started wearing it. Its still crisp, though, and its not starched. The stripes still stand out, it soft blue lines like equally gentle reminders of a past- one of bigger clothes, aspiring to formal attires; blazers, ties and tweed.
All his.

Then, slowly, some started tightening. Loosing their grip on me by tightening it- shortening the sleeves, choking the arms, outgrowing my wardrobe. His wardrobe. Yet some remained, courtesy different styling or bad fits, or just a touch of luck. Years passed, then they became relics. Mere symbols, mere value (if there is any such thing).
Remembrances in storage.

Yet this one lasts. Defying sense, and age, it lasts. Defying fabric tendencies, it remains, obdurately affectionate in its supposedly impersonal touch. Clinging on to my body like love tries to cling on to memories, for they are all it has. Clinging, yet not desperately.
But is it the shirt that clings…or is it I?

Does it matter? For it remains, seemingly plucked from the past only just now, with the sole purpose of holding me, gladdening me, touching me, reminding me. Of letting me enjoy that I own it.

Or rather, that I don’t own it. But it is somehow mine, in my wardrobe- and I wouldn't have it any other way.

8 thoughts:

rusty Friday, September 23, 2005  

Sometimes I wish I could get rid of some memories....unclutter my mind and wardrobe and cupboard....of old moments , old clothes , old junk.....but my heart doesnt let me...it holds on...and on and on....

. : A : . Saturday, September 24, 2005  

Clothes hold so many memories for us. They sometimes have a life of their own. The memories that they soak in. The memories that they bring back. And they cling, with you.

Penny Lane Monday, September 26, 2005  

Its strange how these material things can mean so much more... an old t-shirt, a book, a tape, and best of all... a photograph!

Anonymous Monday, September 26, 2005  

beautiful... and sad.

vague Monday, September 26, 2005  

rusty: its better to hold on to thosse memories, no? for once they're gone, they wont be back even if you wish them to...

.:a:. yup...

penny:- yeah I guess that's why 'material things' as something trivial is a bit myopic...

anon:thanks....and- yes....

>|' ; '| Tuesday, September 27, 2005  

we do get attached to material things...quite often....things which we cant let go of, or things which wont let go of us.

Rat Tuesday, September 27, 2005  

A picture with this post would have been nice :)

vAgue Wednesday, September 28, 2005  

poison: yeah, which one is it though...

rat: i know...din think of it though...ah damn. too late now:)

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